Heartache.
Yes. I’m emotional.
No. I’m not feeling blue.
Many consider “heartache” as an emotion when you go through a break up. For them – Take a funnel, look through the narrow side , widen your perspective of life. For me, as of now, heartache can be very much comparable to nostalgia. Comparable. Not the same .
When you are at home and do nothing but eat, sleep and waste your parents’ money , you’ll realize that you have loads of time to think. Think about what you did, what you are doing, and what you are gonna do. Me? I’m at the “what you did “phase now.
Heartache is whenever you think of your friends. I feel it would be natural if you lived like how we did, for two years. We would be together for almost 12 hours a day, 7 days a week, 104 weeks in total. Holidays meant 3 days at home. Not a day more than that. Run back to hostels, be with others. From a routine like this, to 12 hours of TV a day, or 12 hours of working a day, or 12 hours of writing proposals (Research Proposals. Not Wedding proposals) (I do the TV part.) – sucks. Absolutely.
Heartache is when you see your loved ones struggle. Those who deserve don’t get what they deserve. I am not in interested in any kind of research. My friends would die to be a research associate somewhere. But, I get 2 different opportunities. And the authorities who ask me , tell me strictly that I’m not to suggest these openings to any others. Those who are worthy, those who deserve, wait for eternity. This is heartache.
Heartache is when you literally cannot stop thinking about lost friends. For me, especially one. From stranger to friend in weeks, from friend to best friend in days, from best friend to stranger in moments. The stuff we used to talk, the way we used to talk, the lengths of our talk. I’ve lost many a friend. But, by leaving, none made an impact as she did (a void , too). And I understood one more thing. You’ll get new friends. But, none will ever replace them. (Not a GF, I assure.)
Heartache is when you realize that even though you have a bunch of friends who were with you in every ups and downs, you’ll feel lonely. Saving up something thinking to share with someone, and then realizing that there is no someone ! (Like the First World Problem memes.)
But, I would say that there is a cheerful side to heartaches too ! Something like a joyful sorrow.
Seeing the ads for the new Cadbury Silk Caramel and thinking about how I used to have Silk Chocolate with a couple of people , early in the morning (at times , without brushing our teeth , too ! ), dipping in coffee. Those times , when we used to give each other a silk, almost always when we go home or return . Just a 10 sec long ad. But, gives more than 10 minutes of heartache.
Getting up at 10 A.M in the morning and thinking of the times when I used to get up and go jogging with N . Thinking of the times when all of us used to get up at 5 in the morning, head to the beach, sit there , talk and watch the sun come up.
Going through pictures. The pictures we took when all those who matter to me came for my Bro’s wedding. The fun, the dance, the songs, late night dumbcharades, the sightseeing.
The pictures we took when we went to Alampara fort. (MnM , I and V couldn’t be there as they are HPP Extreme.) 10 people, 5 motorcycles, a 50 km drive on the ECR Scenic Beachway (A highway beside the sea). Followed by the ruins of a Mughal fort, a waist deep lake ,crossing which you’d reach an almost white sand beach with dunes. The last trip we went together, before we left for our homes. That day evening itself, people started leaving. (P left that day. Rekha and S , left a couple of days later, after taking care to flood the entire area.)
Thinking about the crushes I had in the last two years , including the most strongest one I’ve ever had. (But, it was stopped at that stage itself. LOL. ) . The strongest one, includes a very romantic movie like scene on the Rock Beach (Only from my point of view . LOL again. :D ) with the OST of the mallu movie Thattathin Marayath as the background (In my mind, of course.), followed by drama, drama , more drama and finally, curtain falls.
Good or bad, heartache leaves you with a tinge of sadness in your mind. If the happy ones make you feel more sad, then , you’ve lived a good life.
Good Bye !
P.S :- Emotional and not blue – refers to my current state of mind. Not always. For Einsteins, “blue” doesn’t refer to the color blue, the other blue.
P.P.S :- I don’t mean to say that those of my acquaintances who have achieved something do not deserve it. If someone felt so, read what I wrote. Not what I didn’t write.
P.P.P.S :- More clarification on P.P.S – People should learn to develop more sense. They shouldnt start taking stuff too literally. When I say “blah blah blah, you’ve lived a good life”, it doesn’t mean that only that person has lived a good life. Jesus said that he will destroy the temple and rebuild it in 3 days. He was referring to his body. But, since he was a tad too philosophical, the people took what he said literally, and charged him with blasphemy. Things did not end well for both parties. So, even though nothing of this magnitude will happen if you happen to take what I say literally , simply, cultivate the habit, people . Cultivate the habit.
Yes. I’m emotional.
No. I’m not feeling blue.
Many consider “heartache” as an emotion when you go through a break up. For them – Take a funnel, look through the narrow side , widen your perspective of life. For me, as of now, heartache can be very much comparable to nostalgia. Comparable. Not the same .
When you are at home and do nothing but eat, sleep and waste your parents’ money , you’ll realize that you have loads of time to think. Think about what you did, what you are doing, and what you are gonna do. Me? I’m at the “what you did “phase now.
Heartache is whenever you think of your friends. I feel it would be natural if you lived like how we did, for two years. We would be together for almost 12 hours a day, 7 days a week, 104 weeks in total. Holidays meant 3 days at home. Not a day more than that. Run back to hostels, be with others. From a routine like this, to 12 hours of TV a day, or 12 hours of working a day, or 12 hours of writing proposals (Research Proposals. Not Wedding proposals) (I do the TV part.) – sucks. Absolutely.
Heartache is when you see your loved ones struggle. Those who deserve don’t get what they deserve. I am not in interested in any kind of research. My friends would die to be a research associate somewhere. But, I get 2 different opportunities. And the authorities who ask me , tell me strictly that I’m not to suggest these openings to any others. Those who are worthy, those who deserve, wait for eternity. This is heartache.
Heartache is when you literally cannot stop thinking about lost friends. For me, especially one. From stranger to friend in weeks, from friend to best friend in days, from best friend to stranger in moments. The stuff we used to talk, the way we used to talk, the lengths of our talk. I’ve lost many a friend. But, by leaving, none made an impact as she did (a void , too). And I understood one more thing. You’ll get new friends. But, none will ever replace them. (Not a GF, I assure.)
Heartache is when you realize that even though you have a bunch of friends who were with you in every ups and downs, you’ll feel lonely. Saving up something thinking to share with someone, and then realizing that there is no someone ! (Like the First World Problem memes.)
But, I would say that there is a cheerful side to heartaches too ! Something like a joyful sorrow.
Seeing the ads for the new Cadbury Silk Caramel and thinking about how I used to have Silk Chocolate with a couple of people , early in the morning (at times , without brushing our teeth , too ! ), dipping in coffee. Those times , when we used to give each other a silk, almost always when we go home or return . Just a 10 sec long ad. But, gives more than 10 minutes of heartache.
Getting up at 10 A.M in the morning and thinking of the times when I used to get up and go jogging with N . Thinking of the times when all of us used to get up at 5 in the morning, head to the beach, sit there , talk and watch the sun come up.
Going through pictures. The pictures we took when all those who matter to me came for my Bro’s wedding. The fun, the dance, the songs, late night dumbcharades, the sightseeing.
The pictures we took when we went to Alampara fort. (MnM , I and V couldn’t be there as they are HPP Extreme.) 10 people, 5 motorcycles, a 50 km drive on the ECR Scenic Beachway (A highway beside the sea). Followed by the ruins of a Mughal fort, a waist deep lake ,crossing which you’d reach an almost white sand beach with dunes. The last trip we went together, before we left for our homes. That day evening itself, people started leaving. (P left that day. Rekha and S , left a couple of days later, after taking care to flood the entire area.)
Thinking about the crushes I had in the last two years , including the most strongest one I’ve ever had. (But, it was stopped at that stage itself. LOL. ) . The strongest one, includes a very romantic movie like scene on the Rock Beach (Only from my point of view . LOL again. :D ) with the OST of the mallu movie Thattathin Marayath as the background (In my mind, of course.), followed by drama, drama , more drama and finally, curtain falls.
Good or bad, heartache leaves you with a tinge of sadness in your mind. If the happy ones make you feel more sad, then , you’ve lived a good life.
Good Bye !
P.S :- Emotional and not blue – refers to my current state of mind. Not always. For Einsteins, “blue” doesn’t refer to the color blue, the other blue.
P.P.S :- I don’t mean to say that those of my acquaintances who have achieved something do not deserve it. If someone felt so, read what I wrote. Not what I didn’t write.
P.P.P.S :- More clarification on P.P.S – People should learn to develop more sense. They shouldnt start taking stuff too literally. When I say “blah blah blah, you’ve lived a good life”, it doesn’t mean that only that person has lived a good life. Jesus said that he will destroy the temple and rebuild it in 3 days. He was referring to his body. But, since he was a tad too philosophical, the people took what he said literally, and charged him with blasphemy. Things did not end well for both parties. So, even though nothing of this magnitude will happen if you happen to take what I say literally , simply, cultivate the habit, people . Cultivate the habit.
